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It's February the shortest, most romantic month of the year

How do you want to be loved?

February means only one thing. It is the month of romance.

To truly understand your friends, family, colleagues and staff you need to find out how they want be loved!  What are their values, likes and dislikes?  It is easy to do and will help you develop better communication, respect and relationships.

Simply engage in conversation with a colleague today. Ask them questions about their life, what they did at the weekend, what they are passionate about, how they like to spend their time.  Ask them about their jobs, what they like and dislike about it.  Make a note of what they say and map this against the 6 human needs:

1. Certainty – is it important that they know where they are going and what they are doing?  Do they like structure and to have a set plan?

2. Variety – do they thrive on a changing environment, physical activity, and variety in the people they interact with? The need for variety sometimes runs into conflict with the need for certainty, though one should co-exist with the other.

3. Significance - we all need to feel special and important in some way. People seek significance through recognition from others or from themselves.

4. Connection/Love – do they thrive on spending time with others? Everyone needs to feel connected with someone or something be it a person, an ideal, a sense of identity.

5. Growth – we all need to have growth as part of our lives, for some this is very important, others are happy to grow and learn at a slower pace.

6. Contribution – do they like to give back or help others just for the sake of doing something for someone else?

There are six major needs that drive our behaviours. Every individual will place more importance on certain needs. By understanding people better and the importance they place on these basic human needs we can begin to understand one another more. Often the reason for conflict is because their needs are not being met. 

So, don’t neglect your work colleagues this February. Give them some love too!

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